FeElinG GuiLtY....
ytd was my very very good sister birthday..i was supposed to turn up yet i went to chinablack wif jie...actually i intend to go there n pass her the present then i go chinablack but the time dont allow cos im such a girl who likes to 'dili deli' wan...haiz...its kind of disappointment to her n i feel gulity so i wan to turn down my jie but she already promised her fren that she is going..n she said that if i don wan to go she wont go...haiz..then iwas like in adifficult position....but on my way to chinablack..i showed my attitude..(must admit) then my face was damn 'black'....
chinablack...
going to chinablack for the first time..should be excited but bcos i didnt turn up another function..so my mood was abit....hahaha thinking back .....i supposed it to be 2nd time but that it the poly bash n one of my frenz under age..so we didnt go ..but we had a great time at music underground instead. when waiting outsid eim so angry cos jie said that not many ppl going but all is frm ex-yuan ching n i never tok to them wan lo...but later i get to tok to my senior...and start conversation wif most of them......in chinablack..reali R&B lo...n abit retro...wahaha think techno will be far behind soon..to my surprise was...despite of my look..still got a guy name vincent approach me...at this moment suddenly sth flash in my mind that recently i started to tok to vincent the one who i noe in first semester in yr1 nthe one who r reali understanding n nice to be fren wif...but becos of misunderstanding...then we didnt tok..toking abt this fren im reali disappointed that time when we didnt tok..it was so uncomfortable becos he is my jie-mei as well as listener...but thanks to whoever or watever things help me to start the so called frenship again....
friendship...
i noe throughout my secondary school i didnt had a chance to enjoy the time where frenz get to gather ard...or outing together becos that time im attached so i tends to turn down all this outings so other outing they slowly conted me out or tot that i wont be turning so don bother to ask...so in poly or last year...i will tried my very best to treasure all the frenz that i know...especially -ve,lyn,wendy,kaixin guo(jael)...n etc...i noe my 1st impression wasnt gd for ppl who see me..but i will tried to communicate wif them so as to change their impression of me..cos i reali hope to find a true fren ( can share everything wif,available when u need her/him)...one is enough..as i noe my fren wont last long..i used to hav a few frenz who r like that but after awhile becos of quarrel then we r not that close....for me...becos i was hurt n hurt by frenz who r reali close to me n i reali treasure them...so now i dont reali trust anyone soo easily...
i made up my mind becos ued to be someone who tends to look strong but weak inside n ppl noe me will says "if i don noe u i tot u r happy-go-lucky" n i started to changed becos i think y must i act???? but nw i decided to change back becos i feel that one's mood can affect the other...n i noe if im like tt my frenz will be affected n i don wan...now i want to treasure my new classmates...we have to go through everything for 2yrs....n i reali don understand y that girl tends to give me that kind of face in class..don like my face then forget it ...i tried to tok to u..but u don bother then i don think i shld try anymore....
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